a midsummer’s night quiz.

August. We have officially entered that time of summer when people begin to complain about how fast summer has gone by, how soon fall and inevitably winter will be here, and how dreadfully hot it is outside instead of enjoying the scantily clad ladies, outdoor drinking festivities, ass crack sweat, wiffleball tournaments, nude naps, lemonade stands, charred encased meats, the delightful combination of swimming suits and water, and that one annoying song that plays on the radio every 5 minutes that comes to define this solstice (Boom Boom Pow).  I for one will not complain, as I see August not as sign of the end of good times, but as a sign to throw this party into overdrive. Fuck, if I am not arrested by the end of the month for skinny-dipping in my neighbor’s kiddy pool while trying to win a game of Marco Polo versus my bottle of Jack Daniels, I will consider all lost.

But seriously, summer is awesome. And while it should be all fun and games, we need not lose focus here people. We cannot let our brains turn to mush like we did when we were in elementary school where once summer was over we needed 7 months to re-teach us everything we forgot from the previous 10 months. Really though, do you think Michael Israel takes the summer off from tanning, bikini waxing, masturbating in the mirror, and working on his Michael Jackson / Farrah Fawcett / Walter Cronkite memorial painting? NO! Where would that put him once corporate event season came around in a few moths, shirtless dripping of paint and sweating in front of the same old 9-11 tribute canvas, that’s where. Because we need to keep you on the top of today’s game as well, art is hard has created yet another art quiz to keep your minds sharp as tacks and full of fruitful art trivia. As always study each current event question and click the answer you feel to be correct. If you are right, instant confirmation, if you are wrong you will be taken away via interspaceweb magic to learn more about your educational opportunities. Ready, break.

What large footwear manufacturer created a special edition sneaker for what graffiti artist?

Adidas for Lee Quinones

Reebok for Basquiat

Crocs for Shepard Fairey

Nike for Keith Haring

According to Cremation Solutions by “combining art and the very latest in technology,” what is the, “new and exciting way to memorialize your loved one”?

Laser Tombstones

Personal Urns

Lifelike Mannequins

Yearly Animated Shorts of the Deceased

Damien Hirst has found himself in trouble once again with animal rights campaigners PETA, this time for what?

creating a petting zoo of taxidermied animals on the endanger species list for his upcoming show in Canada

making a series of  wigs for his piece “For the Love of God” from the hair of monkeys at the London Zoo.

plastering a bike for Lance Armstrong with the wings of actual butterflies

killing something and calling it art

What “appropration” artist just bought an $11.5 Million Upper East Side Mansion in Manhattan?

Cory Archangel

Sherrie Levine

Christian Marclay

Richard Prince

Wired magazine recently likened a team of art conservationists to what popular 1980s TV show?

The A-Team

Airwolf

Charles in Charge

Saved by the Bell

Speaking of art conservation, which modern artist is currently enjoying their own restorations?

Frank Lloyd Wright

Dan Flavin

Lee Bontecou

Diego Rivera

What job, typically associated with sex, has found its way into the Berlin art scene though in a completely un-sexual form?

Escort Services

Sex Phone Operator

Erotic Letter Writer

Prostitute

Using a piece of cardboard and an iPhone, a University of Cincinnati student created a what?

Portable Phone Booth

Video Game Console

Document Scanner

iPhone with cardboard taped to it

What aging female artist recently graced the pages of Vogue Magazine?

Louis Bourgeois

Yoko Ono

Cindy Sherman

Sally Mann

There is an artist currently creating unusual paintings of Obama naked with Unicorns?

True

False

Enjoy the rest of your summer but remember, don’t borrow my car and absolutely no boys while I am away.

August. We have officially entered that time of summer when people begin to complain about how fast summer has gone by, how soon fall and inevitably winter will be here, and how dreadfully hot it is outside instead of enjoying the scantily clad ladies, outdoor drinking festivities, ass crack sweat, wiffleball tournaments, nude naps, lemonade stands, charred encased meats, the delightful combination of swimming suits and water, and that one annoying song that plays on the radio every 5 minutes that comes to define this solstice (Boom Boom Pow).  I for one will not complain, as I see August not as sign of the end of good times, but as a sign to throw this party into overdrive. Fuck, if I am not arrested by the end of the month for skinny-dipping in my neighbor’s kiddy pool while trying to win a game of Marco Polo versus my bottle of Jack Daniels, I will consider all lost.

But seriously, summer is awesome. And while it should be all fun and games, we need not lose focus here people. We cannot let our brains turn to mush like we did when we were in elementary school where once summer was over we needed 7 months to re-teach us everything we forgot from the previous 10 months. Really though, do you think Michael Israel takes the summer off from tanning, bikini waxing, masturbating in the mirror, and working on his Michael Jackson / Farrah Fawcett / Walter Cronkite memorial painting? NO! Where would that put him once corporate event season came around in a few moths, shirtless dripping of paint and sweating in front of the same old 9-11 tribute canvas, that’s where. Because we need to keep you on the top of today’s game as well, art is hard has created yet another art quiz to keep your minds sharp as tacks and full of fruitful art trivia. As always study each current event question and click the answer you feel to be correct. If you are right, instant confirmation, if you are wrong you will be taken away via interspaceweb magic to learn more about your educational opportunities. Ready, break.

Which large footwear manufacturer created a special edition sneaker for what graffiti artist?

- Adidas for Lee Quinones
- Reebok for Basquiat
- Crocs for Shepard Fairey
- Nike for Keith Haring

According to Cremation Solutions by “combining art and the very latest in technology,” what is the, “new and exciting way to memorialize your loved one”?

- Laser Tombstones
- Personal Urns
- Lifelike Mannequins
- Yearly Animated Shorts of the Deceased

Damien Hirst has found himself in trouble once again with animal rights campaigners PETA, this time for what?

- creating a petting zoo of taxidermied animals on the endanger species list for his upcoming show in Canada
- making a series of  wigs for his piece “For the Love of God” from the hair of monkeys at the London Zoo.
- plastering a bike for Lance Armstrong with the wings of actual butterflies
- killing something and calling it art

What “appropration” artist just bought an $11.5 Million Upper East Side Mansion in Manhattan?

- Cory Archangel
- Sherrie Levine
- Christian Marclay
- Richard Prince

Wired magazine recently likened a team of art conservationists to what popular 1980s TV show?

- The A-Team
- Airwolf
- Charles in Charge
- Saved by the Bell

Speaking of art conservation, which modern artist is currently enjoying their own restorations?

- Frank Lloyd Wright
- Dan Flavin
- Lee Bontecou
- Diego Rivera

What job, typically associated with sex, has found its way into the Berlin art scene though in a completely un-sexual form?

- Escort Services
- Phone Sex Operator
- Erotic Letter Writer
- Prostitute

Using a piece of cardboard and an iPhone, a University of Cincinnati student created a what?

- Portable Phone Booth
- Video Game Console
- Document Scanner
- iPhone with cardboard taped to it

What aging female artist recently graced the pages of Vogue Magazine?

- Louis Bourgeois
- Yoko Ono
- Cindy Sherman
- Sally Mann

There is an artist currently creating unusual paintings of Obama naked with Unicorns?

- True
- False

Enjoy the rest of your summer but remember, don’t borrow my car and absolutely no boys while I am away.

first friday art quiz: who’s who?

As the fascination with Banksy’s identity comes to a close, ask yourself, “do I really know who some of the other major players in the art world are?” If Damien Hirst were to walk by you tonight as you did the gallery rounds in Center City Philadelphia, would recognize him enough to give out a high five? If this man asked to buy one of your paintings, would you know that you are about to become an art star? Well, as you undoubtedly begin your First Friday preparations, take a little time out to better assimilate yourself with the some of these celebrities, you don’t know how it could pay off.

Study the picture, click the link to who you think it is. If you’re right, you will be confirmed. If you are wrong, well you will know it.

- An avid art collector, including the owner of the Lucien Freud that set a record auction price.

- Owner of “lets buy our trophies” football club, Chelsea.

- The photographer that got in trouble in the 90’s for putting Jesus in a vat of piss.

- Curator of contemporary sculpture at MoMA.

- The contemporary architect responsible for new Olympic stadium opening in Beijing.

- Danish Icelandic waterflower Olafur Eliasson.

- Gallery owner Matthew Marks.

- Jeff Koons’ lead fabricator Jack Franklin.

 

- Parker Posey’s stunt double for the Julian Schnabel film Basquiat.

- Copyright infringer Sherry Levine.

- Gallery owner Mary Boone.

- Wife of famed video artist Dan Graham.

- Thomas Struth

- Robert Adams

- Bernd Becher

- Jeff Wall

- Paul Reubans (no known relation to the Baroque painter Peter Paul) creator of Pee Wee Herman.

- The director of the Chicago Art Institute.

- The painter that put poopy on the Virgin Mary.

- A man you should be working on impressing.

art quiz.

I am no Meteorologist, but with temperatures in the 100’s on the Northeastern Seaboard in only the second week of June, I am going to say that this summer temperatures will exceed 864° F. Perfect for all sorts of summer activities. If you are like me, that will mean plenty of days spent lying semi nude in front of your open refrigerator while spritzing yourself with car coolant. There is no better way to pass that perverted time than with a semi-regular art is hard art quiz. You know the routine; click the correct answer and be whisked away via Internet magic to confirmation of your correct answer, click the wrong answer and be sent to see a fellow art is hard reader completing his sweltering art quiz. Enjoy!

 

England’s Royal Parks Foundation has rejected portrait painter Jonathan Yeo’s design, submitted for the foundation’s annual deck chair promotion, because?

- It is a leaning post not a deck chair, Silly.

- It is too pornographic.

- It was to be constructed out of hazardous materials.

- The committee did not like the idea of people sitting on Gordon Brown’s face.

 

Thieves in Ottawa have turned this activity into a lucrative $25,000 venture. 

- Stealing bronze plaques from 7 area monuments.

- Selling copy prints of modernist photography as vintage originals.

- Stealing signed artist monographs from area galleries and selling them on Amazon.com. 

- Selling bootlegged versions of Mathew Barney’s Drawing Restraint 9 on ebay.com.

 

Real-Doll co-creators Jake and Dinos Chapman are making controversial headlines once again by doing what to whose art?

- Erasing Tom of Finland drawings.

- Scratching Jeff Koons public artworks with a Brillo Pad, removing the shine.

- Painting rainbows, stars, and hearts into Aldolf Hitler paintings.

- Editing the hip hop songs out of Spike Lee movies, and showing the edited versions in theaters.

 

In more Canadian art news, what tools where used to steal $2 million in gold artifacts during a Vancouver art heist?

- Nylons and a potato gun.

- Halloween masks and staplers.

- Paper bags and fishing rods.

- Gas Masks and bear spray.

 

Holy Taco has listed this, as number 10, on its list of the 10 Most Worthless College Majors?

- Ceramics.

- Printmaking.

- New Media.

- Art History.

 

When a security guard at the Carnegie Museum of Art recently used a key to leave a large vertical gouge beyond repair in a Vija Celmins’ painting, he claimed to do so because?

- He “Didn’t like it.”

- “The ghost of Robert Rauschenberg told him to.”

- “It was part of a senior thesis project.”

- He “Didn’t know he would get caught.”

 

While everyone knows she is doing it to stir up controversy and raise the prices of her own art, Australian Victoria Larielle, is doing what in protest?

- Filling up her invisible SUV with gasoline at gas stations across Australia, in protest of high gas prices.

- Exhibiting her nude portraits of 11 year old children, in protest of Bill Henson’s censorship.

- Selling locks of her own hair, in protest of depictions of beautiful longhaired women through out art history.

- Refusing to flush her toilet in protest of the myth of Australian toilets draining counter clockwise. 

 

art quiz.

With the end of the school year in sight, art students everywhere are feverishly attempting to complete a whole terms worth of work in one week in order to pass their classes. They will then spend a solid 2 and a half months pretending to make more work. The last thing that these champions of diligence need is another quiz or test. Luckily for them I have compiled this short questionnaire to keep them away from completing their 3-D design foam core masterpiece just a little longer. Click on the correct answer and you will be swept away to a page confirming your incredible girth of trivial knowledge. Click the wrong answer and you will be taken to a photo of John Currin and his greatest masterpiece.

 

Robert Rauschenberg is suing a Floridian artist because?

-  The Florida man placed Robert’s prize winning Labradoodle inside a tire, which had to be surgically removed.

- The Florida man was selling Rauschenberg rubbish as Rauschenberg art, complete with certificate of authenticity. 

- The Florida man attempted to erase a painting by Rauschenberg, inevitably destroying the famed work of art.

 

The art world is a buzz as another public artwork that goes on view this summer in Manhattan. What is that project?

- Danish – Icelandic heart-throb Olafur Eliasson will install 4 free standing waterfalls around the island. 

- Christo will unveil his new piece, The Gates Two: Electric Boogaloo, where he will install 248 electric blankets around Washington Square Park.

- DIA will realize another posthumous art piece by completing the highly regarded collaboration between Gordon Matta-Clark and Robert Smithson where a hole is cut into an old building and then immediately filled in.

 

There is a $1000 award going out to the “next Picasso” in this global design competition for the person that best designs what?

- A new logo for Nike.

- A Google logo to be displayed on the website for Election Day.

- A Pizza Hut pizza box.

 

The first 2,008 registered participants in this summers PG-13 rated orgy by Spencer Tunick in Vienna, Austria will receive?

- A free return coach train ticket within Austria.

- A free gynecology, proctology, or urology (participants choice) exam.

- A limited edition Spencer Tunick t-shirt.

 

This summer, Site Santa Fe’s Seventh International Biennial, cleverly titled Lucky Number Seven, will feature a groundbreaking attribute for a museum show. It is?

-The rejection of the commodification of art by the curator Lance Fung, in which all the art shown will be ephemeral.

-All participating artists will be emerging artists.

-All the art shown will be completely new commissions, specifically created for the Biennial.

-All the art created must be site inspired by beautiful Santa Fe’s specific locale.